Don't Be Shy!

Chysauster? You've seen the signs in St. Ives, Cornwall but what is it. An ancient village of mystery. F'r instance:-

As far as pronunciation is concerned local opinion seems fairly evenly divided into two camps. So, you can take your pick. It's either Chysauster pronounced 'shy saucer' or Chysauster pronounced 'shyster'.

Once you've managed to get your teeth wrapped round that the first thing you are going to need to know is how to find the place.

The easiest way is to take the old road to Penzance (as opposed to that new-fangled A30 thingy). Just head up the Stennack and turn left at the Roundhouse, following the signs to Penzance. It's the road that goes through Nancledra if you're still struggling.

Here's a little mapette to give you some guidance.

Map of route to Chysauster from St. Ives
Image produced from the Ordnance Survey Get-a-map service. Image reproduced with kind permission of Ordnance Survey and Ordnance Survey of Northern Ireland.*

Once you've climbed out of Nancledra you should crest a rise and be able to see St. Michael's Mount. Not much further on you will come to Badgers Cross. Thusly:-

We are not quite sure what is making the badgers cross, although we suspect that being systematically gassed by the authorities might have something to do with it! Route to Chysauster from St. Ives 1
Almost immediately after the house shown above there is a sharpish right turn that is clearly marked (provided you're not barrelling past at 60 mph!). Route to Chysauster from St. Ives 2
Be warned, the road then becomes mostly single track thereafter. Watch out for the emmets who drive as if they are homicidal maniacs and the locals ..... who are homicidal maniacs! Route to Chysauster from St. Ives 3
The road twists and turns a fair bit but just stay on it and follow the signs. Route to Chysauster from St. Ives 4

By the way, if you're wondering why the sign has been vandalised for a while now one of the nuttier splinter groups from Cornish Jihad have been objecting to the use of the English rose as a Tourist emblem. The more artistic have overpainted the roses with the flag of St. Piran, obviously these ones couldn't draw.

It's all a bit pathetic and pointless and distracts from far more important 'local issues'. The fact that, of the last three persons to be caught and convicted for this, two were from the midlands rather tells you all you need to know about these twonks.

There are actually serious moves afoot to come up with a specifically Cornish emblem as the marker for Cornish attractions so if you see anyone spraying these signs in the meantime just chuck a brick at them as you go past, will you?


Next    Home    Site Map

I (thatís me) own the copyright in all the content of this site (except where otherwise acknowledged). You can read it, download it, transmit it and reproduce it only for your own personal use. You are not allowed to bugger about with it. If your computer explodes as a result of accessing this site and its contents, itís nothing to do with me, mate! Copyright Vile Jelly Publications 2001-2009. All rights (and some wrongs) reserved.