10 December 2004


Thought For The Week

Cha noddin fakin yn Ellan voish y vaatey.

[I couldn't see the Island from the boat.]

The End Of Days

Sad (but inevitable, I suppose) news which will, no doubt, bother anyone who cares about St. Ives and its history (i.e. just about everyone except Winwaloe and the property speculators) .....

Hyman Segal popped his clogs at the Eddie Hain Hospital in St. Ives on Monday. He was 90, so it was hardly a surprising news. Nor, on t'other hand, was it welcome news. He was one of the great original artists in St. Ives (as opposed to those who came to live, vampire-like) off its reputation for art.

He moved to live in St. Ives in 1946 where he started by working on a series of 'character sketches' commissioned by the then landlord of The Sloop, Phil Rogers. Of course, he moved on to many and various other works but his sketches of the St. Ives locals, copies of which are displayed in The Sloop, may well be the definitive memorial of that time and those people that were the essence of St. Ives.

Personally, I always loved his masterpiece 'Little Boy In A Rotten Hat' [not the actual title].

I'm proud to say that we (mainly my pseudo-father, Mike) blagged a drink for him and Mrs Hyman after last orders at Christmas lunchtime last year.

In those days there were giants upon the earth.

Incompetence Comes As Standard!

Just when you think they couldn't do any better, the Inflatanauts, have set a new (and very British) standard of uselessness. Regular readers will remember their legendary previous attempts to fly a balloon into outer space. Attempts that were only thwarted by mere technicalities; firstly, the weather (in this country? Really!) wasn't right and secondly, because there was a large hole in their balloon.

Now, they have announced that there will be no attempt at further failure next year because one of the balloonatics has already managed to crash a horse he was driving, thus resulting in multiple fractures of the hip.

So, world record altitude attempt thwarted by horse. Phrases relating to social functions and the organising thereof in manufacturies of fermented beverages spring to mind.

High Rise Developments?

Bad news for Winwaloe. It looks like he'll have to work a few more years before he can afford to buy a place in the burg and start raping it. A recent survey based on Land Registry statistical info has revealed that St. Ives is top of the heap in the whole country when it comes to house price rises.

The survey reflects a wholesale trend whereby the South West generally is shown to have suffered the highest increase in property prices. Since 1995 St. Ives tops the chart with a rise of 302% and this trend was reflected elsewhere with PZ coming 4th at 266% and Porthleven 7th at 263%. All in all, Cornwall had 7 out of the top 10 towns and 13 out of the top 20.

At this rate soon even Brum Scum & the Cockney Rabble will be priced out of St. Ives. Of course, it goes without saying that the locals have long since abandoned all hope of being able to afford to live where they were born.

Next    Back    Home    Site Map

 
I (that’s me) own the copyright in all the content of this site (except where otherwise acknowledged). You can read it, download it, transmit it and reproduce it only for your own personal use. You are not allowed to bugger about with it. If your computer explodes as a result of accessing this site and its contents, it’s nothing to do with me, mate! Copyright Vile Jelly Publications 2001-2009. All rights (and some wrongs) reserved.